Left to My Own Defence....(Aaahhh!!!!)

My In-Laws came to town this past weekend, only for the afternoon (lunch really). I was at work at the time and missed the whole family thing (except my son calling me,  to voice his upset about no ketchup). And during their flash visit, they had the pleasure to meet 'The Oscar', in person.

According my hubby, the encounter went quite well. "He didn't really attack anybody except my Dad." my hubby stated. There were comments about how gorgeous Oscar is, how fast Oscar is, how smart Oscar is, and so on. And then the In-Laws went home and my hubby left for an overnight biz-trip (which turned into the week). And I was left alone with a teenage boy and a teenage feline. And did I mention that I'm not smoking anymore. Cigarettes, anyway. It's half way through day 3 without and doing OK. Considering what I'm working with or against.

It started on the first night when my hubby went away. After a few weeks of not being attacked when falling asleep every night, Oscar has decided to start pouncing on me again. I'm now bringing the bottle to bed with me just for reinforcement. His attacks have increased in frequency and intensity. Even my hubby commented that maybe having Oscar 'fixed' wasn't such a bad idea.

Oscar reacts like a child in every way including tantrums, pouting, excessive vocal ranting, just to start. I've been trying to do more work from home, yet Oscar makes data-entry and blogging near-impossible. As I type, he has inserted himself into my sweater and now, I have a second head sticking out of my midsection. Just.. one... moment...please...

So, it's the next day and Oscar is becoming another teenager trying to rule the house while the "Big Guy" is gone. The nightly bedtime attacks have returned, with a vengeance. When Oscar launched the 3rd attack, the Quilt Monster popped up in front of him, stopping him dead in his tracks. And down the hall he went. That's the last thing I remember before the alarm went off, so he must have gone off to destroy something I haven't discovered  yet.

However, when I came back to check on my boy's progress for school, I did find the following:
1-kitty litter container in middle of kitchen (was on kitchen table when I left)
2-kitty Temptations on kitchen floor (was on counter when I left)
3-nicorette cartridges under microwave table (on counter when I left)
4-Aleve under microwave table (on counter when I left)

Does anybody-else see where I'm going with this list? I can hear that bell ringing frantically as I type, which can mean nothing but trouble for Oscar and something broken for me. Again, one moment please...

OMG! I'll never get this thing done the way I want.
POINT OF WHOLE BLOG:

Oscar looks like this... 

 and I look like this...

Serenity now! Yeah, right. TGIF (Thank God I'm Fried.) Until the next post Peeps;